Helder...
My love...
My husband...
My friend...
My soul mate..
My sunshine..
My happiness..
My everything...
I keep coming back to your blog.. Each time I experience this stabbing-heart sadness finding the same old post at the top of the page.. with every day it feels more painful.. something inside me tells me that I cannot leave it as it is right now.. I feel that you would not like me to leave your blog just like this..
left out so abruptly..
like an unfinished sentence..
You have worked so hard on your blog all those years...
I almost owe it to you..
and maybe I need to do it as well for myself..
Your blog become part of our everyday life.. I miss it..
I miss seeing you sitting in front of the computer, all focused and struggling with finding the right words.. I miss the notes you kept making through the day on scraps of paper, on the reverse side of the receipt, on the tissue, on the bookmark.. this in order to not let go some important thoughts, some ideas you wanted to include in the blog.. so many times we would then look everywhere where is gone that note you wrote earlier on.. :) I miss this too..
I received few messages from your old friends, who have been following your blog, some have left the comment after the last post 'Blog to book'. They are asking: 'what happened? why Helder is not writing anymore? did Helder died...?'
yes..
Helder died..
on Tuesday, the 15th of January... two days before his 41th birthday...
it is four weeks today..
I miss you, my love..
so much....
Sweet Justine, reading the blog is part of my morning rotine,I could feel so close to you... I didnt realize yet that the blog´s purpose has came to an end.. or may be it did´nt.... Julieta Rocha
ReplyDeleteDear Justa, reading the blog is part of my rotine as well...
ReplyDeletebig big kiss...
Miriam
Hi Justyna and Oli.
ReplyDeleteLike Julieta, I am a usual reader of Helder´s blog.
I met Helder by the end of 2000 and until he left Portugal, we had good moments. Not only as colleagues in the same Company, but after work. I remember our old football matches... :)
Seeing that old post "Blog to Book" for to many days made me think that something happened and it did. Helder passed away... It is sad and heart breaking, when we see someone we knew leaves this world... It is terrible, and, as a father, my first thought is Oli.
Death is not the end, it is a beginning, is not a “Goodbye”, but a “See you later”… Someone is dead when all of us forget it… but Helder will never be forgotten. And the best way to keep him alive in our hearts, not only in the family and friends, but also in the one´s that follow this blog for all these years, is to continue his work. Do not shut down his blog, his memories.
Keep it alive.
Keep it strong.
João
Big HuG and kisses from Tomar my dear Justina!!
ReplyDeleteI also keep coming to read Helder's Blog, now Oli and Justina's blog. Be strong and go along in your daily journey.
Carla Damásio
Count on me dear Justinya.
ReplyDeleteI'll always be here for you and you daughter.
I love you
Not really "anonymous" but Richard and Veronica, who like many others, have shared your daily triumphs and setbacks through this wonderful blog since the time we met in UCL Hospital in 2008. The bond that we formed there with Renee, as our families worked side by side to help our loved ones, was like family. And because of the blog, we were able to continue to be part of your extended family, all of us supporting you and Oli, as we supported Helder during his courageous journey.
ReplyDeleteSo consider continuing the blog. We know it isn't easy for you to write, but it is a way of connecting to all of us, without all of us intruding into your life. And should you need us. we'll be there.
Big Hugs
Richard and Veronica
Perwi, tak mocno Cię przytulam i ciepło myślę o Tobie. Pamiętaj, że jeśli tylko będziesz chciała porozmawiać, daj znać. Jestem!
ReplyDeleteTrudno mi wyobrazić sobie to, co teraz czujesz. Wierzę, że Helder jest teraz w spokojnym miejscu i otacza Was miłością. Bardzo, bardzo mocno Cię ściskam
Majka